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Thread: A California 'Teacher of the Year' accused of sexually abusing a former 13-year-old

  1. #1
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    A California 'Teacher of the Year' accused of sexually abusing a former 13-year-old

    ...student once said it was important to be a 'champion' for the kids

    I'm afraid I struggle to understand these stories

    I know that I invite great criticism from some---but I have to tell you in all honesty, I can't imagine any young teacher could possibly have abused me at the age of 13-----to the contrary I would have been like a bunny left loose with the sole mission to try to wear it out!!!!!

    I'll be damned if I would have gone home and told my Mommy

    That poor teacher would be walking bow legged and I'd have a smile on my face that would take weeks to wipe off
    "A pessimist sees the difficulty in every opportunity, an optimist sees the opportunity in every difficulty” ---Sir Winston Churchill
    "Political extremism involves two prime ingredients: an excessively simple diagnosis of the world's ills, and a conviction that there are identifiable villains back of it all." ---John W. Gardner
    “You can’t go back and change the beginning, but you can start where you are and change the ending.” ---C. S. Lewis

  2. #2
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    I had a young just-out-of -college biology teacher when I was a senior in high school that I would have done anything for if she would have just done some extra curricular tutoring with me. Alas, it never happened.

    I did one time have a teacher whose class I never attended provide me and two girls with alcohol. I was friends with one of the girls and she asked me if I wanted to go to an out of town basketball game with her and her twin sister. I was up for that (no pun here!) and was surprised when I was picked up by a teacher with the two girls. As soon as we left the driveway, drinks were mixed and consumed on the 3 hour drive and again on the drive back. It was obvious that the teacher had the hots for one of the sisters. I wonder to this day if the teacher ever got caught doing this in his coming years. I knew he was going nowhere with the girl and I for sure as hell wasn't going to tell.
    The only way of discovering the limits of the possible is to venture a little way past them into the impossible - Arthur C. Clarke

  3. #3
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    As close as I ever got was having the hots for my senior year English teacher...She was 24 and owned the finest pair of legs I had seen in my early career as a girl-watcher...Alas, she was married and was only interested in encouraging my love of literature...I read her obit with sadness a few years ago, but in her honor I got out my copy of the Complete Works of E.A. Poe again, and read it from cover to cover......Ben
    The future is forged on the anvil of history...The interpreter of history wields the hammer... - Unknown author...

  4. #4
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    the closest I ever got was a history teacher in high school , she was my kind of a freak but the only ride I got out her was a jaunt around town in her TR3
    "The only thing that we learn from torture is the depths of our own moral depravity"

  5. #5
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    From the comments:
    My geometry teacher was hot, but only from certain angles.
    My Spanish teacher was muy caliente, but we just didn’t speak the same language.
    My biology teacher was simmering, but we had no chemistry.
    My math teacher has a nice figure, but something about her didn’t add up.
    Fred

    "Everyday I beat my own previous record for number of consecutive days I've
    stayed alive."

    'Take care of yourself, and each other.'

  6. #6
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    I had a John Deere (Construction equipment) account manager who had been a teacher. I got to know him fairly well, even on a bit of a personal basis. He was young, well dressed and a good looking young man---he seemed out of his element on a construction site.

    One day I asked him why he left teaching---I was a tad shocked at his obviously candid response---he could see trouble on the horizon. He taught high school and he told me that he had more than one female student that "displayed" alternative motives for being in his classes. At least one would sit in the front row, wearing a skirt and flash him. Once she knew he saw what she was showing, she would asked to be excused to go to the rest room. Upon return it was obvious that she had baited another hook

    He realized such temptations would eventually take a toll---and he got off the highway before that happened
    "A pessimist sees the difficulty in every opportunity, an optimist sees the opportunity in every difficulty” ---Sir Winston Churchill
    "Political extremism involves two prime ingredients: an excessively simple diagnosis of the world's ills, and a conviction that there are identifiable villains back of it all." ---John W. Gardner
    “You can’t go back and change the beginning, but you can start where you are and change the ending.” ---C. S. Lewis

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    The only way of discovering the limits of the possible is to venture a little way past them into the impossible - Arthur C. Clarke

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    Quote Originally Posted by Mike View Post
    I'm sure he fought her off tooth and nail----for 300 times---for 5 years.
    "A pessimist sees the difficulty in every opportunity, an optimist sees the opportunity in every difficulty” ---Sir Winston Churchill
    "Political extremism involves two prime ingredients: an excessively simple diagnosis of the world's ills, and a conviction that there are identifiable villains back of it all." ---John W. Gardner
    “You can’t go back and change the beginning, but you can start where you are and change the ending.” ---C. S. Lewis

  9. #9
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    Quote Originally Posted by Dave Grubb View Post
    I'm sure he fought her off tooth and nail----for 300 times---for 5 years.
    Don't touch me there again!...Or there...Or there...Or especially there!......Ben
    The future is forged on the anvil of history...The interpreter of history wields the hammer... - Unknown author...

  10. #10
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    Statutory rape fantasies are not a good look for anyone.

    The child was 13 years old. There is no possible way to for such a person to form consent so this was rape. Arguably, it was pedophilia. I know it is all in keeping with the "guy culture" to snicker and say "boy, I wish I had been him" but in truth, this is making light of a criminal sexual act. Adults should not be having sex with children. Teachers, who are trusted adults, should not be having sex with students. Locker room talk about having so much sex that a woman would be walking bowlegged degrades them.

    This sort of hyper masculinity is toxic and teaches yet another generation that women are there for a male's pleasure, to not have respect for boundaries that protect those that have less power, to minimize sexual crimes, and in the end, put our women and children and anyone without power at risk of tremendous psychological harm. And before the bleating about "woke" objections start, remember that this isn't about you and your own need for sexual stimulation. It is about whether if your daughter had been preyed on by her teacher if you'd be so accepting. Or if your son had been.

    And no, I don't think anyone here would actually be OK if it had happened to their child. Maybe all of you would not have been harmed if it had happened to you. Maybe you were all mature enough to handle all that comes with sexual activity at the tender age of 13. But talking about it this way, laughing about it, making light of it, is not appropriate for grown, mature men. Just as it was not when some of you decided to talk about how much fun it would be to shoot the type of gun that was just used in a mass shooting. It is not decent or respectful to those that have been harmed.

    I guess that is what I am missing here. You all are decent, moral men but you just cannot see how your words are sometimes insensitive and disrespectful. And if I point that out, I'm spoiling the fun and need to just shut up and let everyone have their fun. "Just go to a different thread" was what I've been told when religious jokes start. Well, all that does, as far as I can see, is give people permission to act badly. I'm trying to get back to a sense of shared decency and community here. I don't know why other men, specifically, want to act badly in public and then expect others to just bite their tongues but silence is complicity. So I'm saying something.

    I've said things in the past. When Muslims were called "rag heads", I spoke up. When Mexicans were called "messkinds" or "wetbacks", I spoke up. It caused trouble but as someone I admire said, it was "good trouble". And I hope that by trying to establish some norms of behavior, this place was made more inviting to those wishing to get away from the sort of keyboard combat other sites see.

    I fully realize that this might make me a pariah here and I'm sorry if that happens. I don't want this site to become a place for locker room talk and for the most part, it is not. I genuinely like everyone here. We have good discussions and Mike has a (gasp!) liberal sense of what should be allowed on an official basis and I'm not talking about anything official. I would hope that people would have a sense of maturity and decency and not fantasize about statutory rape, or make light of it when it happens, or maybe not use the occasion of a mass shooting to discuss how much fun that gun is to shoot, or use ethnic slurs or tell religious jokes that trade in stereotypes. I never hear these sorts of things in groups that I socialize with and can only think that the anonymity and distance of the Internet has loosened our grasp on how grown, mature men should act.

    My apologies for being long-winded. It is a sign of my respect for you all and my desire to continue to enjoy our interactions here that made me want to explain myself. If I didn't like you all so much, I wouldn't bother. I know - "don't like us so much, PLEASE!!!!!"

  11. #11
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    Kevin, in our setting I don't find the things you are pointing out to be vulgar or distasteful. In some other, more formal, settings, I could mostly agree with you.

    Please don't expect me to be something I am not. I am a Texas Redneck and I have no plans to join the genteel elite. I also do not intend to change the way this site operates. It works for me, and it apparently works for the others who post here as I get no outcry from them.

    Our threads are open for almost any view and you are certainly welcome to post your views - I think you bring value to the site and look forward to what you might have to say.
    The only way of discovering the limits of the possible is to venture a little way past them into the impossible - Arthur C. Clarke

  12. #12
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    Hey, I like Texas rednecks!

    Do you remember about 20 years ago, when you and I discussed Marcus Aurelius? The topic was "First Principles" but I recommended the "Meditations" for further reading, if you wanted. I am the same person in any setting. I don't act or say anything different than I always do. Marcus Aurelius made a big impression on me. Many of the classical writers did but he was concerned with how men should act and think and believe. He had virtues that he thought men should strive for:

    Auctoritas - "Spiritual Authority" - The sense of one's social standing, built up through experience, Pietas, and Industria.

    Comitas - "Humour" - Ease of manner, courtesy, openness, and friendliness.

    Clementia - "Mercy" - Mildness and gentleness.

    Dignitas - "Dignity" - A sense of self-worth, personal pride.

    Firmitas - "Tenacity" - Strength of mind, the ability to stick to one's purpose.

    Frugalitas - "Frugalness" - Economy and simplicity of style, without being miserly.

    Gravitas - "Gravity" - A sense of the importance of the matter at hand, responsibility and earnestness.

    Honestas - "Respectability" - The image that one presents as a respectable member of society.

    Humanitas - "Humanity" - Refinement, civilization, learning, and being cultured.

    Industria - "Industriousness" - Hard work.

    Pietas - "Dutifulness" - More than religious piety; a respect for the natural order socially, politically, and religiously. Includes the ideas of patriotism and devotion to others.

    Prudentia - "Prudence" - Foresight, wisdom, and personal discretion.

    Salubritas - "Wholesomeness" - Health and cleanliness.

    Severitas - "Sternness" - Gravity, self-control.

    Veritas - "Truthfulness" - Honesty in dealing with others.

    I don't know if this makes me an elite. I'm just someone who spends a lot of time reading about the past and I've found things that resonate with me there, so I try to share them.

    And sometimes, when I run across a person like John Lewis, or Bobby Kennedy, or Gandhi, or Buddha, or whomever, I try to share their thoughts with others.

    You said who you are and I can respect that. This is who I am.

  13. #13
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    Quote Originally Posted by Kevin View Post
    ........ This is who I am.
    And I respect that!

    I speak (vocally) differently with different groups because different groups have different customs and expect different behaviors. Accent, grammar, verbiage, ect. It is something I recognize and have no idea how long I have done it. My guess is just about everyone does.
    The only way of discovering the limits of the possible is to venture a little way past them into the impossible - Arthur C. Clarke

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