The Raccoons In The Basement

This bit may just be too true to be in jokes —

You’ve been on vacation for two weeks, you come home, and your basement is infested with raccoons. Hundreds of rabid, messy, mean raccoons have overtaken your basement. You want them gone immediately. You call the city and 4 different exterminators, but nobody can handle the job. But there is this one guy and he guarantees to get rid of them, so you hire him. You don’t care if the guy smells, you don’t care if the guy swears, you don’t care if he’s an alcoholic, you don’t care how many times he’s been married, you don’t care if he has a plumber’s crack, you simply want those raccoons gone! You want your problem fixed! He’s the guy. He’s the best!

Here’s why we want Trump. Yes he’s a bit of a jerk; yes he’s an egomaniac; but we don’t care. The country is a mess because politicians suck, the Republicans and Democrats can be two-faced and gutless, and illegals are everywhere. We want it all fixed! We don’t care that Trump is crude, we don’t care that he insults people, we don’t care that he has changed positions, we don’t care that he’s been married 3 times, we don’t care that he fights with Megyn Kelly and Rosie O’Donnell, we don’t care that he doesn’t know the name of some Muslim terrorist.

This country became weak and bankrupt, our enemies were making fun of us, we are being invaded by illegals, we are becoming a nation of victims where every Tom, Ricardo, and Hasid is a special group with special rights to a point where we don’t even recognize the country we were born and raised in; ” AND WE JUST WANT IT FIXED.” And Trump is the only guy who seems to understand what the people want.

We’re sick of politicians, sick of the Democratic Party, the Republican Party, and sick of illegals. We just want this thing fixed. Trump may not be a saint, but we didn’t vote for a Pope. We voted for a man who doesn’t have lobbyist money holding him back, a man who doesn’t have political correctness restraining him. We all know that he has been very successful, he’s a good negotiator, he has built a lot of things, and he’s also not a politician, not a cowardly politician. And he says he’ll fix it. And we believe him because he is too much of an egotist to be proven wrong or looked at and called a liar. Also, we don’t care if the guy has bad hair. We just want those raccoons gone, out of our house, NOW .

Sad comment on today's society.

I never have, nor will I, subscribe to the philosophy that the end justifies the means.

You said:

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a man who doesn’t have political correctness restraining him

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Nor the Constitution for that matter.

The raccoon chaser is not made better because he speaks with no truth in hm while he farts and burps :peace:

Dave, you are so predictably easy to trigger...:tiptoe:

I have zero tolerance of trump's bad habits---he is a disgrace and embarrassment.

You are so cute when you are angry.:evilgrin:

Disgusted would be a better choice of words than angry---angry requires more energy than I am willing to dedicate to trump.

I like the metaphor. We conservatives elected a couple of mild-mannered Bushes when the Raccoons moved into our basement and set up shop only to watch them unsuccessfully try to make pets out of them. Now that the critters have turned rabid, we elected an exterminator and it has really pissed them off. Napalm in 2020.

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Originally Posted by wacojoe

Napalm in 2020.

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I still remember the formula for it if push comes to boom...:boom:...Ben

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Originally Posted by wacojoe

I like the metaphor. We conservatives elected a couple of mild-mannered Bushes when the Raccoons moved into our basement and set up shop only to watch them unsuccessfully try to make pets out of them. Now that the critters have turned rabid, we elected an exterminator and it has really pissed them off. Napalm in 2020.

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I suggest your so called exterminator brought in his own bevy of rabid critters.

As for the Bushs---HW might have been a little mild mannered--possibly to a fault, but W. made his mistake by picking some of those rabid raccoons to be his mentors/advisors and left them out of the basement. :redmad:

The Bushies now seem awfully palsy-walsy with the Clintons and zerO’s.

If I had to choose between them and the scum bag currently occupying PA Ave---I'd probably just try to opt out :dunno:

Don’t worry, Dave, you won’t have to make that choice.

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Originally Posted by wacojoe

This bit may just be too true to be in jokes —

You’ve been on vacation for two weeks, you come home, and your basement is infested with raccoons. Hundreds of rabid, messy, mean raccoons have overtaken your basement. You want them gone immediately. You call the city and 4 different exterminators, but nobody can handle the job. But there is this one guy and he guarantees to get rid of them, so you hire him. You don’t care if the guy smells, you don’t care if the guy swears, you don’t care if he’s an alcoholic, you don’t care how many times he’s been married, you don’t care if he has a plumber’s crack, you simply want those raccoons gone! You want your problem fixed! He’s the guy. He’s the best!

Here’s why we want Trump. Yes he’s a bit of a jerk; yes he’s an egomaniac; but we don’t care. The country is a mess because politicians suck, the Republicans and Democrats can be two-faced and gutless, and illegals are everywhere. We want it all fixed! We don’t care that Trump is crude, we don’t care that he insults people, we don’t care that he has changed positions, we don’t care that he’s been married 3 times, we don’t care that he fights with Megyn Kelly and Rosie O’Donnell, we don’t care that he doesn’t know the name of some Muslim terrorist.

This country became weak and bankrupt, our enemies were making fun of us, we are being invaded by illegals, we are becoming a nation of victims where every Tom, Ricardo, and Hasid is a special group with special rights to a point where we don’t even recognize the country we were born and raised in; ” AND WE JUST WANT IT FIXED.” And Trump is the only guy who seems to understand what the people want.

We’re sick of politicians, sick of the Democratic Party, the Republican Party, and sick of illegals. We just want this thing fixed. Trump may not be a saint, but we didn’t vote for a Pope. We voted for a man who doesn’t have lobbyist money holding him back, a man who doesn’t have political correctness restraining him. We all know that he has been very successful, he’s a good negotiator, he has built a lot of things, and he’s also not a politician, not a cowardly politician. And he says he’ll fix it. And we believe him because he is too much of an egotist to be proven wrong or looked at and called a liar. Also, we don’t care if the guy has bad hair. We just want those raccoons gone, out of our house, NOW .

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Well said, some don't want it fixed though, they can't let on though.